Biking for Burgers (and Bourbon)

So, you're looking for a great burger but don't want to break the bank.  If you live in Toledo, Ohio, you're in luck.  Bar 145 has been around for a little while now and has become a fixture on the Dry Fly Salty Dog food circuit.  This little bar and restaurant on Monroe Street has the best burgers around, not to mention live music and an impressive selection at the bar.  The bar's theme is "Burgers.  Bands.  Bourbon."

Be forewarned, however, that these are not your grandma's burgers.  With topping ranging from Mango habañero Chutney to fried egg to prosciutto, this is a food destination for the more inventive burger eater.  Even the choice of meat can leave you indecisive.  With options ranging from chicken to salmon to turkey to veggie to beef, it may be tough to even start the process of deciding what's for dinner.  Fear not, the folks back in the kitchen will make sure it's all great.

Yes, a burger lurks somewhere under all of this goodness.

White China, Red Chucks is the logo emblazoned on the back of all of the server's shirts at this original Toledo eatery.  Behind the bar the bartenders will be happy to whip you up one of the house specialty Manhattan's (complete with a maraschino cherry) or pour an ice cold pint of a regional microbrew, including the Kentucky Bourbon Barrel Ale.  The Bourbon Ale is really a treat if you like beer and bourbon and can't decide which you'd prefer.  This tasty beverage has all of the wonderful qualities of both.

But let's talk about the real reason we come here...burgers.  DF and SD ride our bikes to this local haunt every Monday that we are home for Endless Topping Monday.  As the name conveys, the toppings are endless every Monday night.  With the exception of cheese (only one is included in the price), you could theoretically craft a burger with one of every topping that 145 puts on its menu.  And that's a lot of toppings. While you have the regular favorites, such as ketchup, pickles, onion, you also get to select from things like fried onion straws, bacon, mango habañero chutney, julienne jalapenos, grilled apple, guacamole, artisinal lettuces, arugala and many more that I cannot remember.  It does not matter what you choose, it will be good.

What is a burger without cheese?  145 proudly serves Zingerman's Cheese.  Zingerman's will certainly be on an upcoming blog post, but a brief explanation should suffice for now.  Zingerman's is an Ann Arbor institution that is renowned for its breads, meats, and cheeses.  It is one of the most famous Jewish Deli's outside of New York, and rightfully so.  My old law school roommate used to get Zingerman's sent to him by his mom because she always feared he wasn't eating.  She didn't worry about me not eating, but I still enjoyed a taste of undergrad while living in New Orleans.

Anyway, 145 provides at least 12 cheese options.  I typically go with the Zingerman's Detroit Brick, which has a smooth creamy texture when melted and a very mellow taste.  Other options include cream cheese, horseradish havarti, goat cheese (also Zingerman's) and the usual suspects like Swiss, cheddar and American.

Will you eat this burger or will it eat you?

The real measure of a burger isn't the cheese, the toppings or even the meat.  A truly great burger is never served on a plain white roll.  The bun is what makes a burger.  At 145, you always have the option of going breadless, but if you want bread you have some great choices.  Brioche, an onion roll, ciabatta, or (my favorite) a pretzel roll can cloak your meattastic creation.  The brioche and onion rolls are baked fresh daily, so you know you're getting some high quality grub.

A more reasonably sized option.

The sides alone are a reason to come here.  They have crispy truffle oil fries, fried green beans with a sweet chili sauce and the most not-to-be-missed mac and Gouda!  Any way you try it, you're sure to be happy. 

Stop by one of these Monday nights.  You'll probably see us in our usual spot drinking, eating and laughing.  Bar 145 is endorsed by the Dry Fly Salty Dog Blog.

The Pho Soul Brother, Check It Out Now!

Hello gentle reader!  It has been several weeks since we have graced you with tales of travel and food, and other matters of the charmingly offensive persuasion.  Well, luckily for you, the wait is over.

The past several weeks have seen the Dry Fly and the Salty Dog traveling to tropical islands, stuffing our faces at a variety of wonderful food establishments, and cheering on the greatest football team on planet earth (despite that little trip up with 'Bama).

You may be wondering what is with this week's blog title.  Ever since the London Olympics, Fatboy Slim has been resurging in popularity.  For those of you who live under a rock, FBS is a DJ from across the pond.  He had a very popular track a few years back called the Rockafeller Skank.  I have no idea what a Rockafeller Skank is, but I'm sure it's funky.  For the uninitiated, please enjoy the video provided to me by my friends Anne and Robert.  Their adorable little daughter obviously appreciates the funktasticness of FB Slim.  After seeing this video, I figured it had to be incorporated into this week's blog. 

Funk Soul Brother, Pho Soul Brother?  What's the connection?  The connection can be found at a wonderful little eating establishment at 3636 Upton Avenue in Toledo called Pho Vietnam.  Their website is http://www.phovietnam.us/.  The prices are very low, but the quality is high.  Now you must be thinking, I get the Pho part, but what about the Soul Brother?

Are you sitting down?  You should be.  The Soul Brother comes from the fact that, in addition to serving a wonderful menu of Vietnamese sandwiches, Pho soup, spring rolls, etc., they also have a FULL MENU of Soul Food.  How is that for awesome?  Not convinced?  Check out this picture below consisting of Pho, Vietnamese Sandwich (Pork, Jalapeno Pepper, Cucumber, Sprouts), spring roll, and fried okra.

Now this is the Pho Soul Brother!

 The name of the game at Pho Vietnam is fresh.  The restaurant is a family shop.  The Salty Dog is a regular here and she tells me that the family bought the restaurant when it was just a Soul Food place.  Being from Vietnam, they decided (rightfully so) to cook Vietnamese food as well.  Thank goodness for that.

All of your regular soul food dishes are on the menu:  collard greens, fried chicken, fried okra, mac 'n cheese, etc.  For me, however, the highlight is Pho.  This is a HUGE bowl of simple beef broth filled with noodles, basil, sprouts, scallions, red onion, cilantro.  The broth is cooked down until it is clear.  This is no easy process because the fats and proteins that rise to the top of the pot must be constantly skimmed.  The result is a clear broth.  The clearer the better.  The bowl is served piping hot and immediately before being served, thinly sliced pieces of raw beef are added to the bowl.  The soup is so hot that the meat is cooked almost instantly.  This dish is great year-round, but I'm really looking forward to a bowl after cross-county skiing at Ottawa Park this winter (provided we have snow).

My goodness, there are little brown balls in my drink!

 One last note.  Try the mango bubble tea pictured above.  It is awesome and made from scratch (read: real mangoes).  The Dry Fly prides himself on being a daring eater.  I've eaten worms in Botswana, ants at camp, assorted chocolate covered bugs over the years, and myriad other things people may consider gross.  This one tested my adventurous spirit for no other reason than it felt weird in my mouth.  (Insert "That's what she said!" here.)  Essentially, the bubble tea is a mango smoothy filled with these little gelatinous balls.  The balls don't taste like much, but the texture is a bit weird.  The drink is served with an over-size straw so that you suck the balls up with the smoothie.  It's like a smoothie-ball-smoothie-ball pattern.  You get intermittent brown and orange sections coming up through the straw.  Very tasty overall.  Try it if you're feeling adventurous.  I think I'll stick with just the smoothie next time.  It was incredible!

Pho Vietnam is fully endorsed by the Dry Fly and Salty Dog!  Hope to see you there soon!

Fuck You, Guy Fieri!

I suspect that many of you have seen the show, "Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives."  If you haven't seen this show, the premise is quite simple.  Some dude named Guy Fieri travels around the country and visits eating establishments which fall under the titular categories.  Upon arrival, he speaks loudly and eats two bites from a few of the eatery's dishes, says wow, and moves on to the next place.  Always clad in an aloha shirt, or some equally obnoxious equivalent, Guy's main trademark is spiky white hair that looks like it was stolen from a militant lesbian gym instructor and a matching goatee.

Now I don't have any issues with any of the above.  My only real issue with this ass-clown is that he hasn't been to Toledo to try some of our local eats.  Growing up, I was always told that Toledo has more restaurants per capita than any city in the US.  While I have no concept of the veracity of this statement, I know for certain that we have a lot of places to eat in Toledo.

In fairness, many of the restaurants we have here are complete shit.  This fact is not surprising given that many of my fellow Toledoans are morbidly obese and the all you can eat buffets seem to be well populated at any given time.  Quantity over quality seems to be a pervasive theme here.  Now I'm no svelte supermodel, but dammit all if I don't try to eat healthy most of the time.

But back to Mr. Fieri... as I said, my main issue with this guy is that he hasn't come to Toledo to try any of our myriad dining establishments.  I'm not sure why this is so, but the fact remains, he has never been here.  In an effort to fill what I deem to be a gaping void in the culinary map, I submit the following list of my top 3 diners, drive-ins or dives in the Toledo area.  (This should not be interpreted as the best eats in Toledo, but the best eats which could realistically be classified in one of the aforementioned catergories.)

3.  Schmuckers:  2103 N. Reynolds Road.  This is a Toledo establishment and must be included in any list where dive is a category.  While this is the last place one should go if on a diet, the food is definitely worth the trip.  This is especially so when a meal is completed (or made) with a giant, diabetes inducing slice of their chocolate peanut butter pie (or any other slice of about 20 varieties).

2.  Star of India:  415 S. Reynolds Rd.  Walking into this restaurant two things will grab the diners attention.  First, this place smells awesome.  The owners cook everything from scratch and it comes through in the taste.  Second, the entire place is still the chromed out, retro diner from years past when it was called Dudley's Diner and served burgers and fries instead of Korma, Bhuna, and naan.  The owners are very friendly and will adjust spiciness to suit one's palate.  While they have only been around a short time, they are making an impression on the Toledo food scene.

1.  San Marco Taqueria & Mercado:  235 Broadway.  This place is a real gem.  In order to enter the restaurant, you have to pass through the mercado where they sell everything you could imagine a Mexican market would sell.  They also have fresh made chicharones, also known as pork rinds.  These aren't the bagged pork rinds you get in the store, but actual pig skin, deep fried and otherwise unadulterated.

Walking into the restaurant, you are bombarded by a color wheel explosion courtesy of the bright decor which puts you in a Cabo state of mind.  That's before you even eat the food.  The salsas are freshly made, along with everything else in the taqueria.  Portions are generous.  We usually start with some salsa and chile con queso.  While I try to sample everything on the menu, I usually stick with the burrito.  These topping stuffed tortillas are a thing on wonder.  I almost never finish mine.  One can choose between beef, chicken, carnitas, or my favorite, carne asada.  If you haven't been here yet, do yourself a favor and check it out.

 This young lady enjoys a big as your head burrito and glass of Sangria at San Marcos.

As for you Mr. Fieri, until you visit our fair city and try some of our food, I have but two words for you.  Fuck You!

You can do anything, as long as you do yoga.

Let me preface this by saying I love my yoga instructor!  She is incredibly encouraging despite the fact that my fat ass wiggles and writhes on the mat like a beached manatee.  (See below for comparison picture.)

That being said, she also tells me that I can do anything I want to my body as long as I do yoga.  To you madame, I say poppycock!

After a breakfast meeting today, we decided that a trip to the Lucas County Fair would be a great idea.  In fairness, the idea was not ours, but that of my brother and his girlfriend who both run marathons where they throw colored paint at you and compete in some sort of event called the Tough Mudder.  The Tough Mudder sounds cool only because they give you a beer in the end.  I suspect the beer is something shitty, like Corona.  Regardless, no beer is worth the agony which one must endure to earn said beer in said competition.  But I digress...back to the fair.

Having promised my wife that I would go to yoga this evening, I figured...what the hell, I can do anything so long as I do yoga.  Half a funnel cake and one corn dog later, I must beg to differ.  I could feel the sweat dripping from my pores, except it wasn't sweat.  It was hydrogenated oil and lard, or whatever the fuck they fry those tasty pieces of golden brown ecstasy in.  Oh, and this was before I ever set foot on a yoga mat. At least I didn't gorge myself on deep fried Twinkies, too. 

So, we ate a bunch of crap and then pet some cute animals that will likely be on my dinner plate before too long.  Not so bad, other than the small hands and smell of cabbage.

Well, having promised my wife that I would go to yoga, I went to yoga.  You don't want to piss off a Puerto Rican or a sea captain; and I have to deal with both.  Little did I know that this was the black belt, ninjitsu crazy ass yoga...Level 3.  It's Yoga is a cool concept.  The founder taught yoga to the Grateful Dead back in the day.  You know I can get behind that brand of hippie hullabaloo.

Now you may have seen folks doing yoga before, maybe you've even done it yourself, but what these folks do is straight bad ass.  Folks were doing handstands and crazy moves with legs in different directions and all their weight on a pinky.  Manatee me was just trying to touch my toes.  I was a little over my head.  When all was said and done, I enjoyed going.  I just hope I'm welcome back after the funnel cake grease puddle that I left all over my spot on the floor.  I hope someone doesn't slip and fall doing one of those hand-stands.

We celebrated surviving yoga by riding our bikes to Koto Buki for sushi.  We love the 007 Roll.  Worth the trip for some fresh sushi.

The captain just gave the all hands on deck call....gotta go!